I Beat Up Paula Abdul

These are stills from LB, and they represent those moments of sublime beauty that we were able to capture. If this movie never gets done, images like these will haunt me for the rest of my life.

LB in its current state is just that: A series of profound moments and images. Adrien cradling her child and drinking out of a vodka bottle, Lyle sitting in silhouette with his daughter, Mike being left behind in the garden and walking up a desolate road, Leah collapsing while watering the garden, Young Adrien walking next to the canal and weeping, Jeff's shellshocked expression when the secret is revealed, and it goes on and on...

Ken once mentioned to me that he thought this story was different from any other movie he had ever seen, and that's why he wanted to be involved. The way ideas, faces, political/social concepts, and location were used were actually unique, and beyond any preconceived notions people had about the material.

When the board viewed pivotal scenes from the initial production, comments ranged from "This could be the next Big Chill," to "sheer brilliance tempered by moments of agonizing amateurishness." Hence, the reshoots.

I have finally accepted the fact that this film means as much to me as anything else in life, and that disturbs me. I never gave any credence to the idea of myself as an "artist," and made it a point throughout my career to never take the precepts of art culture seriously. But I guess this is what it means to be an artist. When you do it even when it could signal your emotional/personal/financial destruction. When you do it not because you want to, but because you have no choice. When you do it because you are compelled.