I'm A Swift Boat Veteran

Masochist to Sadist: "Beat me! Punish me! Whip me! Hurt me, hurt me, HURT ME!"
Sadist to Masochist: "No."

It's been a long time since I've updated this thing. I haven't had much time, due to having kids and all. Save your whinnies, bleats, and moos for someone who gives a goddamn.

Check this out: veblin.net.

An old friend from the film school daze who is doing something somewhere somehow. I am duly impressed.

I think that he might think I think him to be a genius. There is a woman at the recycling center who agrees. She said to me the other day that he "must be a genius, cause it doesn't make sense, or else it's just stew-pid."

An imaginary life is stranger than fiction.

My anniversary was yesterday. My loving wife made me a gorgeous dinner of lemon chicken and shrimp. And she even sent me a fruit basket. Sometimes I feel as if I don't deserve love like that. I always thought I'd end up with an obese Asian woman who would scream at me to bring her a scotch and coke while occasionally pushing aside an immense boob to scratch her knee.

And she would only have 2 teeth.

I once met a 6-ft tall midget.

Seacrest out.